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Friday, July 1, 2011

Toronto - Six Months Later

When I look back six months ago it is if I look back in another life time. So many intense, beautiful and meaningful things happened to me during these six months in Toronto, that I sometimes have the feeling I am living somebody else’s life.
When I left Romania, I actually ran away. My country and my town couldn’t have me anymore and I couldn’t have them. I was slowly turning into a small person, with a small mind, living a small life. For me, sky is the limit and my dreams have no borders, so living like that was killing me on the inside. I remember I was feeling drawn and bored. Tomorrow was just another day.  My life was going by too fast. I didn’t stop to cease the day anymore. What was even worse, was that I couldn’t foretell anything interesting in the years to come. It seemed that when I ended my relationship with my ex boyfriend, I ended my relationship with my town and with my country. Therefore my strong desire to escape as soon as possible.  At least for a while, to figure out where I stand and what I want to do with my life. Everything felt wrong and I didn't fit there anymore.
I chose Canada for my escape and I let fate choose between Toronto and Montreal.  I believe in fate. So many times destiny had its way with me and proved me wrong when I was so sure I was right. There were times in my life when I thought I can have things my way. Many times I discovered that in fact, different things were carefully planned for me and what I wanted didn’t matter. That is why I don’t fight destiny anymore. I walk through life with a smile on my face and a positive attitude, always ready to embrace the unknown and to take all chances life offers me. I don’t spend my lifetime planning ahead anymore, I would rather spend my lifetime living and enjoying everything I am given. The same happened with Canada. I just intended to come here. The rest was nothing but destiny. That is why I like to think that I didn’t choose Toronto. Toronto chose me. It was supposed to be a five months getaway, to put my mind in order and get ready for the next step. Now, six months later, I want to live here forever. From the first moment I walked the streets of Toronto, I felt like I was home, back from a very long journey.